So the day was any other day, except that I had to tell my husband that I was pregnant. Most of you would think “wow, what amazing news!” Yes, the news was amazing, but this wasn’t any wife telling her husband that they were about to be parents. This was a 44 year old woman, telling her 44 year old husband that we would be adding to our family. Our blended family of 4 kids ages 21, 17, 14, 13. This would be interesting.
Here is the scene: I’m in the bathroom just having taken three (yes 3) pregnancy tests. All three showed positive almost immediately. I read and reread the box to see what would show a false positive. Menopause can do it. YES! It’s GOT to be that. But then, reality begins to set in. I’m exhausted, feeling sick and oh yes, that little monthly friend hadn’t come. As I am standing there in disbelief, I hear the bedroom door open. Oh God, what do I say? He knocks, I don’t answer. He knocks again. “Everything ok in there?” I say “we’ll that depends”. “Depends on what?”, he asks. I open the door and hand him the test. I see his mind working as he processes this information I’ve just handed to him. He looks at me, then at the test, then at me. “You’re not pregnant are you?” “I thought the Dr. Told you that wasn’t possible.” “Well, I say, I guess she was wrong.” We both stare at each other in disbelief. This definitely not something we expected. Then it hits us. WE ARE HAVING A BABY! We smile, hug and continue to wonder how this was happening. It’s surreal. Then, after it sinks in the fear hits us…….we have to tell the kids!
The first doctor visit
We talked about telling the kids and had decided to wait until after the first doctors visit. We wanted to have a couple weeks to enjoy this experience before telling the teenagers who we all know can put a damper on even the best news.
I arrive for my first appointment. The receptionists asks me what I’m there for. I tell her and I feel her eyes trying to mentally calculate how old I must be. She hands me the mountain of paperwork and as I start filling it out, I still can’t believe this is happening.
Paperwork finished, that wasn’t so bad. They take me back. As I wait, in a gown that’s too big and a room that’s too cold, the nerves start to kick in. I hear a knock on the door and my Dr. walks in. Now, you think she would say hello, or congratulations, but she doesn’t. She says “It IS you!” I look at her, confused. She says “when I was looking at your chart before the appt, I remembered the conversation we had at your last appt.” I say “oh,you mean the one where you told me it would be almost impossible for me to get pregnant? “Yep, that’s the one!
Never thought you could surprise an OB/GYN by being pregnant, but I guess you can. Now comes the fun part. Yes, I’m being sarcastic. The Dr. now gets to share with me all of the horrible things that could happen due to my “advanced maternal age”. All of the birth defects that statistics show drastically increase after age 40. The toll it will take on my body, labor and delivery with someone as ancient as I am. Wow, what a way to start out! I’ll need genetic testing, a perinatologist, regular sonograms and more regular monitoring. If I was a person who worried, I would be crazy at this point.
We finally get to the good stuff and she does a sonogram. Everything looks good. Whew! Only 32 more weeks of this, I got this…..
Telling the kids
We decided to call Allyson (21) and give her the news on the way home from the doctor. She was away at school, so she couldn’t be worth the other kids when we told them. After some uncomfortable small talk, we told her and surprisingly, she was excited! We thought “ok, this might not be as hard as we thought” we were wrong.
We got home, sonogram picture in hand. We decided we would use that to share the news. Should we do it together, at one time? No, we will tell the 2 older kids first, then we will tell the 13 year old.
We call Mike and Pink(my daughters nickname) in to the living room. We don’t know what to say so we just tell them we have some news and show them the sonogram. They both stare at it. Pink looks at me, then says “no way!” And gets up and leaves the room. Mike looks at it for a minute and his response is “don’t you guys know how to prevent that?” Hmmmm, not the responses we were going for. Pink comes back in to the room. She’s calmer now and seems more excited. She looks at the picture, and calls the baby “nubs” that would be her name throughout my pregnancy. Mike seems to accept it, but as a 17 year old junior in high school, he’s more concerned about himself than becoming a big brother again. Three down, one to go. We go up to tell Jeremy. We show him the picture and he had no idea what it is. Paul explains to him what it is and that I’m pregnant. He just said “ok”. We talked for a few minutes, but being a thirteen year old boy, he really had nothing to say in the matter.
So now the immediate family knows, the sonogram is done and everything is good. We decode to wait until after Easter to tell the rest of the family and I also decide not to say anything at work. We only have another month of school and I don’t want to have to deal with it. I did tell my boss, since I was having quite a bit of morning sickness.
This was going to be an interesting 9 months! Boy things had changed since I had my last baby 15 years ago!
Stay tuned for my next blog. ..visiting the hospital, and walking into work for after being off for the summer five months pregnant! SURPRISE!